IBS 58 - EXODUS 4:10-12

But Moses said to the Lord, "Oh, my Lord, I am not eloquent, either in the past or since you have spoken to your servant, but I am slow of speech and of tongue." Then the Lord said to him, "Who has made man's mouth? Who makes him mute, or deaf, or seeing, or blind? Is it not I, the Lord? Now therefore go, and I will be with your mouth and teach you what you shall speak."

Exodus 4:10-12

Me too Moses. Me too. I understand his struggle in this. I understand the doubt that he had in speaking. I’ve never really felt so silly speaking or self conscious as here in Costa. I have spoken Spanish and English all my life yet I find my self fumbling over my words in my head or in actually talking all the time. It honestly has made me so afraid to speak at times. Yet He doesn’t want me to live in that fear. He has called me here for more than being shackled by something that has no place in my life. It’s crazy to me because in the verse before the Lord is doing astonishing things, turning a staff into a snake then back, making his hand leprous and restoring it again, revealing that He would turn the river to blood. And after all that Moses is still doubting because of his inability to do it. And obviously God knew. God knew Moses wasn’t going to be able to do it. He didn’t call Moses because He was qualified or because He was an excellent speaker/leader. He wanted to glorify Himself through Moses’s weaknesses. In the same way He desires to with me. With all of us. He sees all the places where we lack. He sees our humanness in its entirety, yet He calls us. He shows us that we can’t and we need Him. And He wants to be what we rely on. Not ourselves. But we doubt. We doubt that He will or can do it. He sees how unequipped we are and still He says “go”, because it was never about Moses it was about what God desired to do in and through Him. He reminds him of who is and how great our God is and tells him to go. And still in the next verse Moses doubts and still doesn’t think he can do it. And that really just makes me think of myself. But I want to have that faith that is able to not see and still believe. Because there is trust in Christ and the strength He gives. Because He has called us. He uses earthen broken vessels who are not qualified. Still He calls, and equips, and faithfully carries us through. Because He doesn’t call us because we are equipped, or because we can do it. But He has equipped us because He has called us.